CHOKE HOLD: A Message to Officer FrancIs X. Livott or/ The Imagined Life of Iris Baez

Veronica Golos    

(On December 22, 1994, New York Police Officer Francis X. Livoti killed Anthony Baez after the football Anthony was playing with hit the car in which Livoti was seated. Livoti first attacked Anthony's younger brother David, and when Anthony came to his brother's defense, Livoti turned on him and strangled him in a choke hold.)

I lived a life before you came
I cooked, went to church
lived for my children
before you came

I washed my floors, prepared pernil, arroz con habichuela y mofungo
it was good
before you came

My flesh was soft before you came
my heart was calm before you came
my son lived before you came
before you came

I never raised a hand against another
I believed what the Bible told
I tried for peace always peace
before you came

I wished love for my children, then
I wished them children, then
I wanted better for them, then
so the years of floors and laundry and cooking
would somehow be good for them

but then, you crushed the life from my boy
you choked his breath and beat him down
till he lay on the street and died.

And you told me lies
you smiled I remember and lied
even in my grief, I knew that smile

and I knew that lie
I leave the church to the widows, now
I cook plain, the clothes pile up and I am no longer neat
as I was before you came

I curse your name
point my finger at heaven
call down death
death for a child
your child
you.